Wednesday, January 30, 2013

Ho Hum

This week is awful....Saturday will be 4 years since my dad died....I started taking Birth Control last week to help regulate my cycle(its been insane since my dad died) and its been making me feel like crap :(  This week my sleep schedule has also gone down the drain. My boyfriend texted me last night that we need to talk about us today....which I dont think will end well so I am sure that I will be in tears for a while and Im sure I will stop eating sleeping and working out because I have a feeling that CJ is going to break my heart tonight and Im not sure how well I am going to take it :(

So I need prayer, encouragement, love, a friend....anything right now would really be appreciated.

Tuesday, January 15, 2013

Trust

I'm trusting that the Lord will one day provide for me my own classroom, my own students, walls, a place to share laughter, learning, smiles, love and joy.
I'm trusting the Lord will one day provide for me a husband. A guy who has the Lord first in his heart. He knows values and will work hard to show me love, joy, and to be there for me and our future together.
I'm trusting the Lord that one day I will experience a father's love once again. It does hard some days when I miss my earthly father and all that I want is love from my dad, to cuddle, to kiss him, get a hug, talk and it is bringing back lots of pain and heartache to me right now while typing this. I am hoping that wherever my father may be that I am making him proud.  That's all I want to do. Is to make my daddy proud of who I am becoming.