Saturday, April 30, 2011

I must be a baker

So I baked again: this time----lemon bars. If you want the recipe, let me know :) I like to bake for others :)

I went to a bonfire last night, and let me tell you--I feel like garbage and Im so incredibly TIRED no joke!!

My friend Tori came over today and we chatted and baked those lemon bars. I ran 7 miles this morning. I literally RAN an errand---I went to the bank to move money over so I can pay rent tomorrow :(

Any amazing recipes I should try out after finals are over? Any good books? I need some good reads :)

Friday, April 29, 2011

Lots of Fun is coming my way

I hung out with some friends in the union yesterday. It was quite calm and relaxing!! I am def going to miss Campus Crusade and all my friends. But we have facebook, cells, Skype, and of course I can also go visit them too ;)
I have been so lazy today. I watched like 6 episodes of One Tree Hill this morning, ran 4 miles(Go me!!) and got ready for the day. It is quite chilly in OH today. O where are you summer? I think I may have found a summer job?! A Boys and Girls club in Toledo is looking for a lifeguard. I may I dont HATE it but if its something that God wants me to do then I suppose Ill get it right?!
Today I am going to a bridal party for my bible study leader/friend of 4 years tonight and then going to my friends parents house in MI for a last bonfire before finals/graduation. I am seriously in AWE that I graduate in 9 days. Ahh!!!
I am doing NOTHING tomorrow which I guess could be okay, but I mean I do want to do something. I am looking for a graduation dress today with a friend. I am one of those girls who HATES shopping for anything, even groceries.

Did anyone watch the Royal Wedding? I didnt but its okay. I really dont care about the,, and honestly if the News channel doesnt care about what happened in Alabama or Georgia and the awful tornadoes that hit down there, why should I watch the wedding?

I was a REBEL last night and did a prank on a friend and it was quite fun to say the least. I have NEVER done anything like that, but hey its okay to have fun with your friends right?!

I have some questions for you fans out there:
1) What random things would you like to know about me?
2) I have ran a 5k before, but do you think I could handle a 10k or a half?
3) Anything you want me to blog about??

O and PS thanks Red Sox Wife for a shout out today in your blog!!! :)

xx from a daughter of a KING<3

Thursday, April 28, 2011

I think it's suppose to look like this?

I am hoping these pictures show up on my blog! So the second one is me and one of the days I wore my One Dress one Month. The womens basketball team was in the championship and I of course went and took my dress with me! I ended it on Sunday. I am so glad I did this. It was such an opportunity I will NEVER forget. I pray for those women every day of my life. I def. dont know what I would do if I was in that situation. I would def. need God in my life.

Soo the First picture-- It is my cheesecake I made. I think it looks AWFUL. I do live in an apartment and dont have a sweet oven and it tends to burn things. I kind of want to cry bc it looks awful. Hopefully it tastes okay. Or else I will def hate myself. I tried SOO hard.

Ok so this is going to be a vent and I hope noone hates me for this: Soo if you havent read all of my entries, then you may not know this:On Feb. 2nd, 2009 I lost my dad to thyroid cancer, and with graduation coming up in 10 days(o man I can use TWO hands to count) I am really craving for my dad. This is my first milestone in my life to accomplish without dad here. I have to keep pausing to type because I am FIGHTING back tears. I hate living alone. I hate being single. I hate feeling so alone and abandoned. I DONT want to graduate and leave this community I have. This SUCKS. I want to be thinner(Im HUGE) and I just want someone to like me. Sorry if I made you become sad or worried about me. Hopefully I dont blow away with all the wind we have going on in Ohio.

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Check In

Right Now I am obsessed with a Christian rapper called Lecrae. I LOVE this song I just found: It is called Check in! LOVE it! You should check it out!
I did 4 miles on a treadmill today. I feel like a turtle. I did it in 46ish minutes. Can we say a snail could have caught up to me?!
I had to call Triple A today because my car wouldnt start--had to get a brand new battery :( Praise the Lord my mom would so loving and she got it for me!! Thanks Mom!!
Going for pancakes tonight with my bible study. Last one EVER in college. It is so sad to think in 11 days I graduate. I am starting to get weepy just thinking about it. Its a milestone I am going to HAVE to make it through..its my first one without dad. IDK if I can make it. I almost just want to stay in college forever.
I am LOVING spring break. I went to grandmas and hung out with her for a few days. I got to see my best friend in Columbus and then my best friend here at school stayed over last night and we talked and watched Tangled. Pray I find a summer job, because right now I feel like I am having NO luck and I want to cry.
I am attempting to make a cheesecake tomorrow. Wish me LUCK! Does anyone ever read my blog? I feel like I write just for the heck of it? O well its okay. I just want someone out there to see the Love I have for Jesus and want to have that same relationship.

Saturday, April 23, 2011


It is seriously SOOO beautiful today!!! I went on a walk with my friend Nickie and we went on a stroll while walking the dogs. 3 miles baby. She even took me to a workout class. I did Insanity today. Can I just say that I about died?! And Shawn is INSANE!!! I can now say that I tried it. haha
I feel like a turtle lately. I dont really want to workout. or eat. or run. or redo a paper I need to fix. I am also sitting here with my head resting on a turtle stuffed animal that my mom has on her futon couch. yes we have one for a couch at home.
Question: Is it bad that my stomach is bloated from drinking 2 bottles of water? I also had 3 glasses at lunch today. I think I hit the quota of water for the day already and its not even dinner yet! haha My mom is taking me to dinner and then we're going to watch HP while I work on my paper. BOOOO.
I need some book titles because I am on break and need something to entertain me :)

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Hot Chocolate

I wish I knew how to post pictures onto my blog. Or else I would show you my One dress for one month. and my hot chocolate I just made in my pretty blue mug.
It is so insane to think that I am going to end my LAST semester of college with a 4.0 Can I just say-HOLY cow thanks God!!!
I am almost to Spring Break, and yet next week it is suppose to booo
I am going to see my Grandma and I am so excited. My grandpa passed away Dec. 7th and I miss him greatly, and yet my grandma is doing so insanely well. She is such a strong woman of the Lord and I am so inspired by her.
I need a work out buddy to help me run a lot more and keep me accountable with my work out schedule. I wish someone would help me. O and a eating accountability partner. Boo I just wish that the blog world all lived like right next door to each other :(
I cant believe I graduate in 18 days. MIND.BLOWING!!! I only have two more bible studies, two more Cru's and only like 2 more weekends of being a college student. Whoa!! I really do wish I was engaged and getting married(because I feel like that is the trend of graduating college=degree=marriage) but nope not this person. It is so hard to trust God. Any advice out there?

Tuesday, April 19, 2011


Sunday I ran my first 5k. I survived. Im still a little sore. I ran it in 31:59 I am quite proud of myself. I def. almost puked a little after mile 2, but I didn't.
Only two more days until spring break and I CANT wait :)
I am quite homesick right now. I miss home and dad and everything about my hometown.
I really need to lose some weight. I dont eat pasta, breads(very rarely), red meat, rice, or sweets(very rarely) and yet I still feel like I could improve my looks and such. It is so hard to be content with how I look, especially when I feel like I dont agree with how God made me to be. I know that I am suppose to be content and know that I was fearfully and wonderfully made but its so incredibly hard.
I am really struggling with being single. I just want to find the one God has for me, and its hard to wait and be patient until His timing happens.

Saturday, April 16, 2011


I cant sleep. There is a huge storm going on outside of my window. The wind is brutal. The rain is slapping my windows. My apartment is making creaky noises and needless to say on my day to sleep in, I get woken up at 5:57 and can't go back to sleep.
So I decide to blog. I am sure no one is going to read this. I just need to vent to get something off my shoulders--I miss dad so much I wanted to cry myself to sleep, but didn't. I wanted to cry for the rest of my life, but that didn't happen. I cant believe in 22 days I have to graduate without my daddy, my best friend, and it hurts. It hurts that one day(I hope soon) I meet the guy God has for me, and then we get engaged. My dad won't be there to meet, to say that the guy can have my hand in marriage, and then be there to walk me down that aisle. Whenever my wedding day is, it is going to be THE hardest day ever in my life. I dont even want to think about it because deep down inside I feel like it's never going to happen and I want it to---SOON.
I can't seem to think of myself as beautiful. I see a fat ugly beast who cant be skinny or anything beautiful in that sort of nature. I am wanting to make myself throw up, to deprive myself of certain foods, and just run and run this whole summer while looking for a job of course. I know God made me and that I am his, but o man it is so hard to love myself and then I think inside of my head--this is why noone likes me bc I dont like myself because i dont love myself and then I get depressed and want to just chop all the fat off my me and then someone would like me after that and I would like myself. Why do I believe lies, believe society, believe whatever the stupid devil tells me? O wait, because I am that stupid person who listens to those lies, those little voices, and all the ways Society tells you MUST be the truth and the God's truth or Word.
I need a good book to read while I try to burn 1 million calories.

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Feeling Restless

My eyes are quite red. I feel like I cry EVERY.SINGLE.DAY of my life. I failed my Praxis 2 by 4 POINTS boo!! I am so disappointed, so discouraged. No teaching job for my this coming school year for sure :(
I miss dad like there is nothing else that matters.
I am seriously craving a relationship--to put it more in words engagement. I feel like everyone around me is getting engaged and I'm not. I am feeling so sad and so lonely. I feel like the guy God has for me isnt out there and I will NEVER find him :(
12 days left of wearing my one dress for a month. so insane. ahhh!!
My spring break is in 10 days. and it seriously cant come any faster. I am so ready for it.
I need a summer job--no luck.
So I am a HUGE bookworm---like if I could I would LIVE in a library and read for the rest of my life. I need some books to read for this summer-READY.SET.GO name some for me!!

Friday, April 8, 2011

30 days

That's right..I Only have thirty days until I graduate from UT. It is quite scary.
Today we had our job fair for education. I gave a resume to a district in Columbus, and interviewed with Alaska. Yes you read that right. But honestly, I dont think Im going to get a teaching job this year. I guess I will just substitute around my old hometown until I find something. Boo.
Today is day 16 wearing my dress, I am over halfway done. It is crazy to think I am almost done wearing this dress. Crazy!!!! Ha!!
This weekend I am heading to my last ever spring getaway with Cru. I am super sad. Heck, I started to cry just randomly in the bank today. Yeah IDK what is wrong with me. I think Im going insane!!

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Day 13

I have worn my dress for 13 days.
I have NO voice. well a tiny one.
I want spring break to come.
I like my new look on my blog.
I am in LOVE with Natalie Grant at the moment.
I seriously feel like I waste time on the internet by stalking blogs lately.
This weekend is my LAST Cru event ever--spring getaway
Friday is job fair--equals=me freaking out

Saturday, April 2, 2011

Day 10

I have worn my dress for 10 days now. Well Today is day ten. My dress has gone to student teaching with me, to church, to class, to Cru, to an ice cream shop, grocery shopping, and now my dress is going to go to a basketball game today. UT is in the girls championship game today against USC.

Toledo is in the top five for sex trafficking. In Perrysburg, there is a nonprofit organization that is raising money to build a house for the girls who are in freedom. I go to Campus Crusade for Christ at my campus and a bunch of girls and I are wearing One dress for One Month to help show awareness for this and to take a stand for the women who can't stand for themselves.

I can't believe in 15 days I am running my first 5k ever in my life. I can't believe in 5 weeks and 1 day I will be a college graduate. I cant believe in 2- days I will FINALLY have my spring break!!! I still dont know what I am doing after I graduate but you know what I am just trusting God and leaning on him for my future. Until then, I am going to pray, trust and have faith. Everything will work out from the good of my Lord.